A lot has happened since I last blogged. I went to a couple of concerts (Hotel Cafe Tour, Mary J. & Jay -Z), started up in some marketing courses, went to and graduated from physical therapy for my knee (yay!), and stayed in NB for two weekends in a row. Luckily, I had a chance to see Dave, Kent, and Nelly for a special mid-Spring Boomers experience. I must say, I feel a little like we let them down because we talked it up so much and it ended up being was so cold that we couldn't do all of the stuff that makes it awesome in summer. Don't worry guys, we'll take you back for the full experience soon. All in all, it's been a hectic couple of weeks.
Friday night
I had to see off my friend Bern to her new job/life at Yahoo! in San Francisco. She did it up on Friday at SEVEN off of Fairfax and Santa Monica in West Hollywood. It was tons of fun seeing her and meeting her other friends. She is such a doll that I can't wait for her to meet up with my other buds that are moving to SF. I have a feeling that they might really hit it off an quite possibly make a love connection. I love being a matchmaker!
Saturday-The Big Day
This Saturday Chris Axelgard(Dave's cool adventure-loving younger brother) married Jenny Hansen (his college sweetheart), which meant that I had the privilege of meeting the entire Axelgard clan. Let it be said that the Axelgards are, in fact, as amazing as Dave has told us for years. More than just putting names with faces, I got to interact with all of the family members and got a strong sense of how Dave became so special. Everyone was gracious and welcoming and I had a blast. I can't tell you how fantastic it was to be surrounded by that much love and so many wonderful people to celebrate Chris' transition into a married life. Of course, it must be said Chris and Jenny looked good in their chocolate tux and beautiful white gown. The toasts from PJ and Chase cracked me up. Last but not least, Grandpa Norm performed the service, which made the day extra special. I honestly don't think anyone could have asked for a better day.
Sunday-Another kind of new beginning
Sunday was a different story. At around 11am we got a call at my parent's house in NB telling us that my Mimi went into respiratory arrest at 3am. I didn't even know she was in the hospital but knowing her, it wasn't so much of a shock. She had congestive heart failure and was in and out of hospitals since my Popi died back in 2001. But she always "the cat with nine lives" that made it out of "critical condition" countless times so it was hard to believe that it would be too different this time. The incidents have been closer for the past few years and we've been told it will be "Mimi's last Christmas" so often that it wasn't believable anymore, kind of like the boy who cried wolf. Nevertheless, we all threw on clothes, beelined it to the hospital, and tried to help her calm down to help the breathing treatments.
When I got there, she was lucid and conscious and trying to communicate. It was only by the grace of God that she was on life support to begin with because she was a DNR. Without the tubes, she would have realized her worst fear of dying alone. Instead, she was surrounded by us and taken off the oxygen around 2:35. She just had her last rights and after speaking with the priest she felt comforted and at peace with leaving us. The terror and sorrow and love in her eyes was shocking to witness. Her resolve to fight, even if it meant enduring life with even more pain, was only mitigated when the priest absolved her and allowed her the ability to let go. Watching her leave us and join Popi finally was terrifying, sad, frustrating, and left all of us at a huge loss.
Of course, my family and I grieved and made arrangements afterward but I needed to get a little time to myself, so I called upon the Amiquad for help and help they did. I got a chance to say a few prayers and speak with the G-man in church. On my way to the beach for sunset, I peeped a little rainbow out of the Versa to which Dave replied "The quintessential symbol of hope." That pretty much summed up the rest of my evening. I got a chance to see the sunset over Malibu while I was frolicking in the ocean and watching dolphins swim off shore. It was a beautiful and serene setting and a deeply calming peace settled over me.
(P.S.-Later on that evening my mom told me that she saw a one-legged grasshopper in the car just after they left the hospital, which was symbolic of my gimpy Mimi's presence. Talk about signs from above. Also, so you know...since my Popi passed, Mimi thought that a dragonfly was a symbol for Popi watching over her.)
Overarching themes
Overall, this weekend included two major life transitions-- marriage and death. Normally most people get a chance to experience both separately. For me it was powerful and important to experience both so close together because it really emphasized the importance of family, of having people close to you who know where you come from, what you are about, and understand what makes you tick. Watching my aunts, uncle, and dad sharing their grief was beautiful and unifying and refreshing in the same way it was amazing to see how strong the Axelgard's bonds are. It sounds stupid and random but it made me want to open up a bit more with my fam and let them meet the real me and the person I am aspiring to be and hopefully they will do the same.
I know this post is extremely long so I won't bore you with my realizations any longer. If you have any thoughts comment.
1 comment:
wow, chels. i am behind the times. as usual, your voice really comes through in your writing. i miss you lots and love you tons...errr...maybe the other way around...
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